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A place to find you



It’s been a while. Hasn’t it? How have you been? The daily rituals of my life occupied me so bad that I nearly forgot you. Today too, I will not ask how you are and if you want to read my letter. I am selfishly going to tell you about me and if possible, give yourself a moment to read it, if not, throw this paper in the bin. I would not know it and that way I would not care about it, but do not face me and tell me something that would hurt me forever. You and I both know that I would not have the strength to stand it. 

Though time tried hard to dampen the intensity of the memories I hold of you, only I know how I have changed. The essence of my life; something I could confidently call me, have forgotten to recall ever being an individual, and today, whatever I do, my mind cannot help remembering you. I bring your image to my self-made world of dreams, and I smile in the nostalgia of those fond memories we once shared. Maybe its because I have a heart of a man, I can never see through the illusion. I get deluded in those fragments of hope that flash forth from the memories of the paths we once crossed by fate. And they pull me to you with such intensity that even time is yet unable to numb me so easily. 

Do you know what I dream of when I am alone with myself? It is not a huge castle or a building. There are no butlers rushing around the big corridors. I have no private jet or a helipad in my balcony. My bank accounts have no cash and there is no secret treasure room behind my wardrobe. Guess what?

I dream of a vast meadow with its ground full of soft grass. It's space huge enough to contain thousands of people. 

And, early in the morning, when all the grass would gently bow carrying the weight of dew in their backs, I would walk towards the middle of the meadow in my bare feet. There would be a tree below which the rest of the world would seem like a dream where you would be sleeping peacefully. I would slowly come to you and gently shake you up. You would open your eyes and smile at me. And right there, I would smile back at you with the perfect curve that my lips ever traced.

I think you know why I dream of such a place. 

I wonder why we exist like this, it is the only place where I can find you. 


 

 

 

 

 

 

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